Miss Ellen 'E'

Tracking Your Children Wherever They Go - We Look After Them So You Don't Have To

Heping Create The Next Generation Of Corporate Drones Who Believe Everything They're Told (But Trust Us, We're The _Good_ Guys!

Brought to you by those nice people at Taser®, makers of up-market cattle-prods for use by government torturers (no marks – guaranteed!) and trigger-happy law-enforcement officials who would otherwise shoot you for not instantly obeying their commands, but by using our equipment they ensure you survive, because no one has ever died from being zapped by our products, and anyone who says otherwise will be sued for every $/£/€ they have as we have very expensive doctors who will state categorically and for the permanent record that any unfortunate victim (whose families have our deepest and most heartfelt sympathies and will receive a 10% discount coupon for future purchases of our products) had a pre-existing heart-condition (whether known or discovered during our company-funded autopsy) or was of an uncommonly nervous disposition that the poor policeman could not have known about (plus he was in fear for his life and knew nothing about epilepsy).